You wake up in the morning, and you grab your phone to check the time. It's already 9 am, much later than you expected it to be. It explains the heat in your bedroom, the noises outside confirm that it must indeed be 9 am. Then a beep on your phone informs you about new emails and, of course, you check them right there and then. You never know, it might be an email you really want to read.
This morning this email was not there, but it never is. I wish it was, I like to wake up to your words, but this morning it just wasn't. It was a confirmation that a parcel was out for delivery for me. Signed-for delivery.
Signed-for delivery means.... make no mistakes. You don't want to miss it. So your shower is cut short. New record in washing your hair and shaving your arm pits, after all it is summer. Then you dry your hair close to the door, so you don't miss the door bell. Even though this means that you have to sweep there later, as you lose way too much hair all the time.
You made it, and feel relieved you did not have to answer the door wet, dressed in a towel. And you look forward to the parcel. And you wait. And wait. And wait.
The parents pop in. Hello, hello, come to IKEA with me. But you know you can't, you have to wait for the parcel. And you wait. And wait. And wait. Finally you realize you have to go to the supermarket. You get someone to "watch the front". And you make it back in time. There is nothing else you have to do today, so you wait some more.
But hope is on the decline. The mean voice in your head tells you that there won't be a delivery today. But you tell it to shut up, still 1 1/2 hours of official delivery time to go.
And then it is 2 hours later, no package, no delivery failed notice. Nothing. Finally, the online status confirms that the package is on its way back to the station. No reason given. If you were at home, you would call the hotline and complain, you would kick up a fuss. But your parents block premium numbers. And, of course, the only number for this courier is premium. Not green, not free... no, a hefty price tag attached to every minute.
Thank you, Hermes, I shall never use you again!
